Boss: I don't call TL (her husband) to check him up.
Me: Why not?
Boss: Perhaps he has his own things to do or maybe he just needs some free time to sit at the caffe to enjoy a cupt of coffee for some fresh air.
Me: But aren't you curious to find out?
Boss: Well sometimes I can tell, sometimes he himself will mention it. If he wants to tell, he'll.
Me: Don't you worry about him?
Boss: I would get worried if he promised to be home at certain time but is not home yet. But usually he's very responsible and keeps his promises especially if he's going to pick up the kids. If he can't make it, he'll let me know earlier. Of coz I'll be worried if he doesn't turn up as he's promised.
Me: Don't you like to find out his whereabouts and who he hangs out with?
Boss: I respect his privacy. He has his own friends and his hobbies he wants to do. As for the suspicious bit, it's all about the trust. If he wants to cheat on me, he can just simply make up something when I ask. So what's the point of asking? It's just all about the trust between the couple.
Yes, it's all about the trust. The word sounds simple yet easily ommited by many of us. I guess it's difficult to put trust to people nowadays even to someone who is supposed to be very close to you i.e. your significant other. Maybe we're too discouraged by failed real life examples surrounding us. Maybe we're just too guarded. Maybe we're just complicated.
I grown up in a traditional chinese family. My parents are very strongly bonded as a couple and family values were cultivated amongst its children since young. Like many people, my mum does call up my dad to show her concerns to him quite frequently when he's not home yet as expected. I don't find this inappropriate coz my dad seems to be happy in picking up the calls from us. He tells about his whereabouts to my mum all the time. But after knowing more people from different backgrounds, I am beginning to wonder whether is my parents' style the norm or will it be the one style for all.
I was telling my boss that I know a married couple, which the husband has his wife's email password and reads her emails every now and then. I think reading your spouse's emails is just too much. Everyone needs to have some privacy and space from others including their partner. And isn't it disrespectful and distrustful in checking out someone's emails or other private issues? It will not work that way to maintain a marriage or a relationship. If I were my friend, I would ask for his passwords too. In fact I suggested this to her and obviously he's not too happy about it. Hehe.
It's not easy to put a trust upon someone especially in a relationship/marriage. It's understandable why we lose trust towards someone because of the paranoia and phobia about betrayals we hear and see. But still trust is the essential part in human relationship. It's just like if you're sick, you'll go to your doctor, whom you trust. He doesn't have to be the top med student. It's just a trust to your physician whom you place your fragile life in his/her hands. It's the same in a marriage/relationship, except it ought to be mutual and from both sides. If you want trust from someone, then make sure you don't do anything to make your partner shaken and risk losing the trust on you.
I don't know how well I can cope in this aspect. I just want to find someone whom I can trust and he feels the same too. It's about the little trust we have. Hope this will make human relationship simpler.
♥ every page of my imagination
