How do you feel when you found out that your enemy/the person hurt and bring pain to you/the person you hate(dislike) is suffering or perhaps just died? Will you be happy and thinking "Aha, serves him/her right!"?
No one will ever deny that somewhere along our lives, there are a number of individuals whom we will label them as enemies or someone we dislike (or hate if we were left ravaged). It is easy for me to name a handful of names to be included in this category. I always thought people who have brought so much trouble/problem to my life and then worse still caused me pains and bruises deserve some punishment guided by karma. These recent two years I realize I have reached a "peace zone", a zone where I found my inner peace. I am really surprised that I am not as happy as I thought I would, not even a pinch, when I heard these people whom have brought negativities to me before are suffering. Instead I feel sad for some of them and for some I do not have much feeling, sort of a neutral feeling (not happy but not too sad as if they were some strangers I don't know). But seriously, I don't feel happy seeing any of them suffers.
Maybe I can easily forgive them because what I experienced was not that painful heh? Well, not really. When it comes to our own problems, we are fully involved and experiencing the entire moments of them. No one would be able to have the closest feeling from the incident because they are not involved directly.
I dissected this observation further. I was sitting there thinking "Ok, name some enemies in my life". I did, easily for the first few times. Then I did this continuously in a regular basis. I find the naming task is getting tougher and tougher. I realize no doubt these enemies had imprinted some scars or introduced the pain feeling on me. But I began to acknowledge these past bitterness. Looking back, I found that I actually did gain tremendously from these people through the bitter experiences they'd brought to me. I've transformed from someone with lesser maturity and inexperience to somewhat more grown up with a bit more experience now. Without these training, I am certainly not the better me now compared to the previous me. Now shouldn't I be thankful to these people? Should I still classify them as my hateful enemy not? Does that matter anymore how they are living now compared to our own seeing the fact we are not connected anymore?
These enemies could be:-
Some relatives in the family who are competiting/comparing real hard with us.
Some very good friends who later on have some conflicts for some known/unknown reasons and the friendships are wrecked all of a sudden.
Our counterparts or workmates who have decided to betray or against us when opportunity for climbing the stairs is lesser but demand is getting higher.
Our beloved SO or partner whom we love each other madly but one day the relationship is torn down due to a big fight or due to a gradual gnawing.
Even some strangers when we first meet have been doing something offending (unintentionally?) to us until we never like such person.
Hatred and hate are easily generated in our emotions. Most of the time it was converted from the deep passion of love towards someone. The conversion is so easily taken place because we hold too much grudges against these people we care and love most and view them as the most important person in life. Plus we are too attached to the things involved ie becoming the winner in the relationship or the so-called fight, we want more love and attention from them, we want to prove we are correct and it's the other person who has done wrong.
When the good terms with someone was ruined and not repairable, the best thing is to leave it and life continues. Yes, the pain and damage were already done. But if we continue holding grudges against these people, we are at the same time letting the grudges to continue haunt us. We may or may not successfully haunt our enemies by holding the grudges against them, but we are certainly hurting ourselves more than them for sure. Moving away from the sad issues and gradually we'll do better and one day when we look back we may think, "Oh, did that really happen?" or "Ok actually that's no big deal and that I shouldn't had bitten myself in bitterness at all!"
I still have some people who are trying to make my life a bit uneasy at the moment. But since my past experiences have transported me to the "peace zone" of heart, I have decided not to waste the effort in putting up the "enemies" label to anyone at all now. It takes a whole lot of energy to be angry with someone. The more anger we have towards someone means the more important this person is to us. When the anger subsides, the emotions will be neutralized and then once I've calmed down, I begin to perceive things do happen for a good purpose and though on surface they have brought negative outcomes, in fact they are of good karma.
Although I can't resume close good terms with these so-called enemies as before, I am grateful to them for the "training" they set for me and also the good times we'd had before the "training". It takes some sort of link to be able get to know these people and interact with them, albeit they become our "enemies" later on. Just imagine in such a humongous world population, we didn't pick A, B, C or D as "friends" or "enemies", but X or Y or Z. Yes, it does take a bit of the connection there right? And for this connection plus the good karma they've left us, it's better not to hold the grudges and anger against something already past. Just let bygones be bygones. We can't do anything about the past. The only thing we can do is to grab this moment as this moment will lead to the future. Although I can't be friends with them anymore, I wish them all the best in whatever they are undertaking.
Let it go. Let them go. Let ourselves go.
♥ every page of my imagination
