Boss: Have you met that guy?
Me: Yeah, I've met him once.
Boss: Do you like him?
Me: It is hard not to like someone without even talking to the person.
Surgeon JZ (turning to my boss): That was actually a good answer!
Was I sucking up? Nooo....I could have just pretended that I did talk to that person my boss was asking and just simply nodding to her that "I like that guy and he's a nice person." When I said "It's hard not to like someone without talking to the person.", I mean it is rather difficult to start disliking someone after just a brief acquaintance. It's just like a passerby in the street. Why would you dislike a person who hasn't even done anything to you? But then this makes me think about myself, maybe I did dislike some strangers by just looking at their actions and behaviours. This is what we call bad impression, right? And it is rather difficult not to judge based on these impressions we get from others. We all are aware of the effectiveness of impressions. That’s why we have to dress up for an interview. We look at the mirror to check everything is absolutely fine before we go for a date. We clean up our house before inviting guests to visit. We even try to have neat handwriting to impress the examiners.
I think we have enough of dislike. What about liking someone at first sight? No, I’m not referring to that type of romantically liking someone type of like. Let me put it this way. Have you ever just like a person thinking he/she is nice and will be cool to be friends with by just a glance? Again, it's the factors of impression and judgement being the players here.
Actually I have experienced both like and dislike at the first few sights. Sometimes my intuition seems pretty accurate. But sometimes I realize my little sensor wasn’t working that well. Blame the false impression I received. Blame the wrong judgment I made or blame myself for being judgmental. Blame our perceptions. As time goes by, if we have more interactions with the person, our perception is likely to change. And also bear in mind, nothing is constant. Yes, it is true when we know someone better; we may discover more things about this person. Yet, don’t forget we all change too. The person (his character) is changing. We are changing. The environment and everything are changing.
When I was much younger, I found that I was constantly laying myself open to criticism as an unfriendly and arrogant snob. Maybe I was. But the fact is I didn’t even know these people. After a few years, several people noted to me respectively that I wasn’t that arrogant and cold as I look. In fact I began to receive little “praises” about my improvement in my personality. I was totally oblivious of any effort I would bother to make for this “improvement”. Maybe I was actually not that arrogant and unfriendly. Perhaps I was just a little too shy and put up a cold front? Then during college time, my collegemates even made a remark that amazed me till now. They said I was good at socializing and should make a good career in the sales and marketing profession. “What a joke!” I responded. Even now, I’m still rather confused about my own little personal experience. Whatever it is, it’s history now. But the little thought about impression, judgment, perception and the changing factor remains.
Have you heard of the James Blunt's song, which's top in the UK chart entitled, "You're beautiful"? What about one of the songs I put up in the "Ballad for the season" column earlier by Savage Garden, "I knew I loved you"? Both songs told the story about realizing you love someone from the first sight. Does this ever happen in reality? I’ve actually heard about similar stories of others. Well, romantically I believe it. But after bringing myself to my senses, I am uncertain. It is probably possible to fancy like someone. More interaction is still a must. Some people can even transform from lovers to enemies after a long time of getting along. Understanding someone is a difficult task. We even find it difficult to understand ourselves at times let alone others.
I would rather like than dislike someone at first sight though I try not to let the impression influences my judgment. The story of love at first sight is always sweet. But how often can this happen?
♥ every page of my imagination
