Has the thought of jealousy or uncomfortable feeling occured in your head before when you see you put much more effort than this other person but somehow this other person ended up doing much better than you?I have this thought all the time.
So this is my week four here. Thus far, nothing is successful here. The technique (or project) that I am learning here involves a long and tedious multi-step methodology. That basically means it involves more than one day, and for this case about 2 weeks before you know whether has your experiment been successful or not. I have repeated a few times since I started on Day 1, which explains why up till my week four here, I still did not get anything.
Well, that is still not the point of the entry here. During my visit here, there is another student who came and learned the same technique together with me. While I wanted to make the most out of my short stay here, I had to come in to work during the weekends in order to finish off the long tedious steps sooner. Say if the whole procedure takes 10 days to complete, if I do not come in on the weekend, I would have to wait till the end of the following Friday in order to know the end result. In order to cut short the waiting time, I came in to work on the weekends. I have been doing so since I came here. Compared to the other student, who went partying till midnight and slept in for the whole weekend, his stuff worked after his first attempt, whereas mine still failed despite trying a few times. Yes, I know perhaps if I get sufficient rest (go partying or whatever during the weekends, I might be more efficient and hence productive). But this is not really the problem here. I worked during the weekends but I made sure I had more than enough rest here.
Of course I could complain how unfair it is to me. I have been encountering different technical problems and have repeated so many times that I should get it worked by now. In contrary, this other student who did not work overtime and when he came in during the weekday he complained how tired he was and did not seem that interested in his work. Yet his stuff worked. Sure on surface it does seem a little unreasonable and unfair for me. But after thinking a bit further, I realize I am learning more than him at each failure albeit some were due to stupid careless mistakes I made along the way. Even if eventually my stuff did not work (and seriously, I think it would be the case), I still think it might be due to a good reason for it to happen. Say if this stuff is not going to work, then I have to change my project plan and who knows that might lead to something more promising?
This morning I received an email from one of my sisters who recently graduated from college. She told me she got a decent job offer right immediately by a big company. This was her first job interview and to be honest, this sister of mine made the whole family worried her the most. My parents was worried that she would not even be able to make it through college. In her email, after sharing her wonderful news to me, she told me her concern, which apparently was the family's concern. My other sister was unhappy about her current job. And she had went to a lot of job interviews for more than half a year before she got her current job. She had been complaining how unlucky she was and how fortunate this sister of mine was. I empathize how my sister felt. She did well in her college, in fact she had a much higher qualification than this other sister yet this other sister got a better job offer and worse still got it immediately after her first job interview. However in hindsight, I do not think that she is less fortunate than my other sister. True, she seemed to be going through a tougher path yet her encounters and the training she is getting now makes her a stronger person and all those experiences are invaluable, which will definitely help her somewhere down the road, be it career or other matters in life.
I used to complain about rejections, failures or whatever matters that do not seem to favour what we wished for or how we wanted. But hey, actually, that rejection from the job offer, that relationship that did not work out, that failure you encountered just lead you to somewhere better for you. Without the rejection from that job offer, you would not have waited and hence this better job would have no where to appear. Thank goodness you did not be together with that boy/girl who did not love you enough, if not you would never be able to find your Mr. or Miss Right. Not to mention you learn so much more than you realize after each failure. Come on, all these happen of good karma. It will all work out eventually.
♥ every page of my imagination
