A gal pal of mine is planning to get married. That's not a big news to break here; it was about a funny little conversation she brought up when she broke me the news.Gal pal: Mr. P (her boyfriend) wanted to get married. We'll be going to see the wedding band.
Me: So he's already proposed, hasn't he?
Gal Pal: Well kind of...he been bringing it up several times. But I told him those don't count; he has to get me the ring and prepare something romantic to pop the question.
Me: Did you tell him this?
Gal Pal: Yes. I know he'd not know how and what I want, since I'm picky about the ring and he's afraid of buying something I might not like. So we will be going to the jewellers together and I'll let him know which one I like.
Me: That sounds easy for him.
Gal Pal: Exactly. I told him I didn't want to know when he would get it. I want it to come as a surprise. I told him he could either cook a nice dinner for me and then pop the question or bring me out for a romantic dinner and give me the ring.
Me: That's not a difficult task at all.
Gal Pal: Well, the thing is knowing him, I think he'd just hand me the ring by saying, "This is the ring you wanted." just like how he handed me a bouquest of flowers in Valentine's day, "Take it. This is for you." *looking angry*
A week later...
Me: So has Mr. P bought you the ring?
Gal Pal: Don't even make me to talk about that! *looking extremely unhappy*
Me: What happened?
Gal Pal: He gave some excuses like, the ring is expensive or he doesn't know my size.
Me: You guys are so funny.
Gal Pal: I even told him he could get my other ring and bring to the shop. And damn, am I not worth his one-month salary?
Me: ...*laughing non-stop*
Me: Well, you can always say NO to him and make him try asking again. But remember to take the ring and make him buy another one. *wink*
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My another gal pal was telling me a little quarrel she and her SO had. It was not anything big but it illustrated the communication gap between the Martians and Venusians or I would rather say the Martians and the Venusians view things differently.
So how did the story go? My gal pal and SO bumped in their new neighbors and the neighbors expressed their friendliness of wanting to get to know their new neighbors more. So my gal pal's SO suggested to my gal pal of inviting the new neighbors home for dinner that weekend. My gal pal would love to meet new friends too but she realized the house was a little too messy and needed a weekend to tidy up before inviting guests home. She told him her concern and was trying to be practical of wanting a good rest for herself and him since they had a busy week. To him, he viewed it as, "What? Are you complaining that I'm making you cook dinner and do all the work?" He told her that he'd be cooking and that she could rest and do nothing. But obviously this did not come out that nicely and she viewed it as he was not understanding and despite how tiring they both were, he wanted the dinner to be held that particular weekend. Hence a quarrel was resulted.
I find it a lot easier to associate with the feelings of my gal pals. I can totally understand from their point of view. I come from Venus too, which explains why. Some people (mainly our male counterparts) do not seem to understand why us girls want flowers, a proper romantic proposal, an expensive many carats of diamond ring, that kind of stuff. Are we that greedy and materialistic? Well, I may not be able to speak for everyone, but at least I can assure you many of us are not that greedy and neither are we so materialistic. For those of us who love jelleweries, we could go and buy for ourselves. As for flowers, not many of us love flowers, at least I am not too keen in it. I think it is totally a waste of money. It doesn't last. And I don't even know how to appreciate it. Yet I still expect to receive once on a special occasion.
Then what is it that we are making it so complicated for our male counterparts? Why are we expecting them not only be the one who pop the question, but make it happen in a so-called romantic or to be precise a surprise planned setting? For myself, I think it is a symbol of sincerity and respect. As my first gal pal argued, "Am I not worth his one-month salary?" She is not comparing how much he should spend on the ring. I'm sure if the ring only costs 10 dollars, she would still happily receive it and nod her head, if she could sense his sincerity. I guess we (girls) view it this way; we know it is expensive to get the ring (and trust me, most of the time the girls are the ones who do not like their SOs to spend too much), yet you're still willing to spend on me, that means you value me more than anything else. It doesn't have to be a fancy romantic setting at all. You don't have to climb the Mount Everest and pop the question. Neither do you need to jump into the river in the chilling cold winter to show your sincerity. Something simple yet memoriable and sweet is just great enough. It is just like, the mother does not expect a 100% score from her son as long as she knows he takes the initiative to study without needing her to nag and pressurize him to go study. You could really sense it if the guy has seriously put an effort on it, especially the Venetians tend to have a sensitive radar system.
Are men are from Mars and women are from Venus? I personally do not totally agree although there are times both can have really different thinking. However even amongst men or women, we tend to think and view things differently. This is just human nature. Whatever it is. It is still possible for all to communicate with each other, as long as we all try to look at other's perspective. This sounds simple. However it is always easier said than done. I'm afraid there's really no short cut, except to communicate, communicate and communicate more. Of course my interpretation here for the Venetians' part may be wrong. Who knows I'm actually a Jupitarian?
♥ every page of my imagination
